Do you need an attorney?

If you have determined that your marriage cannot be saved and that you plan to move forward with a divorce, one of the first things to consider is whether you need an attorney.  The short answer is “probably”.  If you google “do I need an attorney for a divorce”, you will get all sorts of advertisements for services and other people’s opinions of your situation.  But I would encourage you to take your time and make a measured decision on how to proceed.  This is, after all, your life and if there are children, it is their life as well.  It is too important a decision to rush to judgment. 

Hiring an attorney is not something done to spite the other party.  I’ve had potential clients visit my office and say that they felt the other party had hired an attorney just to spite them or intimate them or scare them from hiring anyone.  That is not what hiring an attorney should be about.  Generally speaking, hiring an attorney is to protect your rights and to make sure you get an equitable division of the assets.  Hiring an attorney can also work to protect the children from mistreatment or alienation from the other parent.  Experienced family law attorneys know when the courts should step in and issue orders to prevent wrongdoing or to prevent further damage by one party or the other.  They also know when it is an issue stemming from a misunderstanding that can most likely be worked out through mediation,  (More on mediation in our next post.)

Here are a few items to consider and my take on the issue:

Have you ever hired an attorney before?  This may be your first experience with hiring an attorney for any reason, much less a reason this important.  Call several attorneys – at least 3-4.  Talk to them over the phone if possible and schedule a free consultation so that you can meet that person and determine how you feel talking to him or her.  Communication between attorney and client is ultimately very important.  If you don’t feel comfortable with the person or feel intimated by him or her, go to the next one.  I’ve had potential clients say to me that they wanted someone that could “eat the other side for lunch” (really, that’s a quote).  Or that they wanted a “bulldog” lawyer.  I know that sounds satisfying when you are reeling with resentment and anger, but in the long run those attorneys that portray themselves in those terms may not be able to get you the results you are looking for.  Obviously, there are times that the attorney must be aggressive and assert your position in the strongest terms possible.  Personally, I’ve never met an attorney that could not do that.  But many times, if the attorney is too aggressive, you will just end up in court and you may not like the outcome.  A much better approach is to always be preparing for trial, while hoping for a settlement.

Is this a high asset case?  You may think yours is not a “high asset” case; however, do you own a home?  Vehicles?  Do you have retirement accounts?  Is there inherited funds that might come into play?  Is either party self-employed?  Both parties’ entire financial life must be looked at in a divorce and it is much easier to do that with an attorney that can help everyone see the equities in making that division.

Are there children of the marriage?   Obviously, this is a “yes” or “no” question.  If there are children, the issues that the parties will deal with can be complicated.  Toddlers and very young children have a different set of issues than would a 17 year-old teenager.  The parenting plans will be totally different in most instances.  It is also important to note that the rules surrounding maintenance or alimony and child support can be quite daunting if you are not well versed in your state’s statues.  And even if you are, it is always a better choice to have someone in your corner looking out for you and your children.

Can you afford to pay attorney fees?  Unless there are no children and absolutely no assets, you can’t afford not to pay attorney fees.  When I first started working in law offices in the 70’s, there was a common belief that the wife would get her attorney fees paid for by the husband.   And many times, that would be the order of the court.  That is no longer the case and each party should be able and willing to pay for their own lawyer.  Should there be an opportunity to ask for attorney fees, your lawyer will definitely do so.  Nothing is more satisfying for a lawyer than to get their client attorney fees from the other side. 

However, there are situations where one party of the other is not able to pay a retainer.  In those instances, it is much better to seek the assistance of the local Legal Aid Office or other resources for legal help than to proceed without an attorney.  Although federal funds for these assistance programs have been reduced in recent years, there are still resources available for those that qualify.  Also, many states have their own legal aid program that may be of assistance.  A quick search of the resources available in your area may provide the help that you need.  Do not be afraid to ask.

Disclaimer:  Nothing herein should be construed as legal advice or as establishing an attorney-client relationship. This post is meant to be informational only.