Hello world!

Welcome!! I’m Dena Nielson and this is my very first post as a new blogger. The name of this blog – The Unlikely Lawyer – and why I picked that will become clear to you as we progress through these posts together. But the short version is that I am now a retired lawyer that spent almost 25 years in the practice of law. Many times over those years I had to explain that I was the lawyer and that so-and-so here was my client — not the other way around. Even Judges had to have this explanation. More than once.

Background

A little about me: I grew up in south Arkansas. Hence, this accent that I cannot get rid of. Some people think it’s charming. I was unable financially to go to college until I was 33 years old and married to my second husband. I had a new baby and decided to take a couple of classes at the nearby junior college. I took a couple more classes and then a couple more. Pretty soon, I had completed the 2-year Legal Assistant course and had another baby. Those two things are not related but I was pretty happy with all of that. When I was about half way through this course, my Mother told me that she hoped I was able to complete this course but that nothing further should be necessary. I had a family to take care of and I should be focusing on that. She died soon after that conversation. So at first, I thought I should honor her position on things and feel good about this accomplishment. I could just work as a legal assistant.

But shortly, I knew I had to do more. So within 18 months I had completed my undergraduate degree and decided that the University of Oklahoma would be my law school of choice. In 1989, the two main criteria for getting into law school was your undergrad grade point and your LSAT score. My grade point was 3.92 so that was not a problem; however, my LSAT score was probably the lowest of anyone admitted — EVER. They say if you wait long enough, good things will happen. My admission letter came the first week of May, 1990. I had all but given up. But there I was 38 years old and an unemployed Mom of 2 about to enter law school at the University of Oklahoma. I was very excited!!

Law School

I had read all the books about the first year of law school and had been working in law offices for a few years. I had heard a lot of horror stories about law school. But none of that prepared me for the onslaught of work, reading, nerves, and competition that followed. The first year was especially difficult. My children were 4 and 6 and naturally took a lot of attention. My then husband was not especially helpful or supportive so much of the family responsibilities fell to me even though I had more than a full time job. I remember that awful feeling when the first semester grades came out and I did not make all A’s. I didn’t even have all B’s. It’s not important now (right?) but it was quite a shock to my system. I knew I absolutely had to do better. And I did. My grades improved every semester after that. It’s all about learning how to think like a lawyer. That’s sounds trite but it is really true.

I went to law school with absolutely no idea what I wanted to do other than to be a lawyer. But the week prior to the first day of class there was an orientation. A girl spoke about something called the “American Indian Law Review” and the big part was that you didn’t have to grade on — meaning anyone could just join. That sounded great to me as I had become very interested in Indian history during my undergrad classes. I joined right away and by far, it was the best thing I did during law school.

I made it through law school and graduated in May, 1993 at the age of 41. My children were 7 and 9 and my interest in Indian Law had been firmly planted. For the last two years of law school I clerked for a sole practitioner who was Indian and who represented various Indian tribes in Oklahoma and other states. It was a wonderful experience and with him as a mentor, I learned how to practice law and how NOT to practice law as well!

My Experience

After law school and after passing the Oklahoma Bar, I decided to stay and continue in Indian law. However, I also did everything else that came in the door as well — divorces, DUI’s, child custody, adoptions, probates, criminal and any and every other kind of case you can imagine. It was such great experience and certainly gave me a broad base on which to build my career. I was there until 1999 when my law partner passed away. You could say he was still teaching me lessons even in death. We had not foreseen either of us dying and had made no provisions for how to handle anything if that were to happen. I was basically out of a job. The Indian tribes would not honor any of our contracts because after all, I was non-Indian and they didn’t feel they owed anything to me. And maybe they were right. So I moved my practice to another location for a few months but I knew that bigger things had to be coming my way.

An opportunity came along to continue in Indian law but I would have to move to Denver. I was recently separated from my husband but thought this might give me and the children a fresh start. They were now teenagers so I was worried how this move might affect them. They both assured me that they were up for the move so in June, 2000, we became Colorado residents leaving all the hurt and sorrow behind.

Colorado

I moved to Colorado to be “of counsel” to a small firm that focused its efforts on Indian housing issues. Not exactly what I had been doing for the last 8 years, but I needed to be employed and I thought the new area of law would be fun to learn. I could also continue with the clients that I still had from Oklahoma. This worked for about 4 years but then it became apparent that I needed to go out on my own. By this time, I had remarried, my oldest was in college and the youngest would be graduating from high school soon. I was 53 and basically starting over. And since I was starting from scratch, I decided to step away from the Indian law and open a Family Law firm. Family law had been the one constant throughout my practice. So for the next 14 years I was a sole practitioner with a Family law practice in Colorado. I have maintained my license in Oklahoma as well. I did many, many divorces, child support cases, child custody cases, juvenile cases, and on and on.

Retirement

I retired from the active practice of law in January, 2018. I was so looking forward to the days of sleeping in, doing whatever I wanted, no clients calling or emailing, no court dates, but . . . after two years’ break, I’m ready to be productive again. Or at least I think I am. I tried to start a blog for my firm a few years back, but it just never got off the ground. That was probably because I didn’t have time to develop it properly. Hopefully this one will not be like that.

Intent

It is my hope that this blog will be entertaining and useful for those preparing for divorce, going through the proceedings, and even after the divorce is over especially those trying to co-parent their children. I don’t claim to be psychologist but I have seen enough divorces, including my own, that I feel I have something to offer that may help you get through the tough decisions you will definitely be facing. I also plan to include stories from my days as a litigator. You can’t make that stuff up and it can be pretty entertaining.

Thanks for reading. A new post will be here soon.